I'm unsure of how to start this writing as I feel like I am in between 2 worlds and they have just collided. I have just tried for the 4th time to put my son down for a nap...one I know he needs and one that I need as well. But I've been thrust into toddlerhood....I know of my own choosing...but I'm overwhelmed. This weekend was terrible. After a great day at the zoo, I've started to decline. I have been sick, which doesn't help but as I've tried to cope...I've only failed with mixing motherhood with my "normal" life.
Now I went back in and tried to get him back to sleep and he was quiet for about 3 minutes and now he is back to singing to himself. Which normally doesn't bother me but today it does....am I a bad mom. Is this much frustration a part of this whole thing?
I've missed all of the parts of his life where he needed me for everything and now he is a toddler with a mind and heart of his own....
well back to it!
2 comments:
Definitely part of the job! And ya know, some days I want to throw my girls out the window...and I've made peace with that feeling...I don't throw them out the window and I think that makes me a good mom! One little tidbit to pass on...its not what you feel that makes you a good or bad mom, but how you respond. As a mom, you're gonna feel everything about your child, motherhood, etc.! I wanted to scream at Emma one day, instead I walked away and sat in our basement for 5 minutes. My mom commended me on my good mothering! Go figure! Debbie, I didn't know what the heck I was doing for like the first 6 months of becoming a mom. Do your best, don't judge yourself based on your emotions, be proud of yourself for your choices, and remind yourself that you've only had him for a matter of weeks! You're doing great Deb!
Yes! The frustration is a part of it and heck no...you are not a bad mom. I have a sense that you one of the best moms. It will surely all take getting used to but don't start harassing yourself for feeling frustrated. It's normal and if you didn't get frustrated at your kid every once in a while, I'm not sure we could be friends. :)
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